ode to the 100-calorie pack

Upon starting a new job on december 19
I was given little to sink my teeth into
As I must patiently wait  for holidays to end
And the docketing of legislation to continue

To stave off my boredom I read up on old laws
The minute I walk through the door
But as usual I cannot wait until lunch
Or the snack I let myself eat at 4:00

I made the decision, or perhaps the mistake
To purchase 100-calorie packs
So when in the afternoon, I’m losing my mind
My new coworkers I do not attack

Bags of cheese nips and chocolate pretzels
One box sold and the other for free
Can you blame me for falling so helplessly
For a Target sales gimmick of this degree

Having made their way to my cubicle cubby
They sit patiently awaiting their turn
For the time upon whence, snacking may commence
And I chew loudly without the slightest concern

How can I be quiet when these little cheese crackers
Send endorphins straight through to my brain
Or when a chocolate pretzel is left to melt on my tongue
My excitement I can hardly contain

At least they are 100-calorie packs
I reason with the fatty in my head
So I’ll still have plenty of room to binge on junk food
Before hubby is home to break bread


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